Author: shalysewb

Shalyse Wright-Bethea is the Founder of Design and Scheme. She has been working as Professional Organizer and Productivity Consultant. Shalyse is an activist and she’s passionate and that reflects in everything that she does. Want to chat, have questions or want to hear my thoughts on a topic? Send me a shout: designandscheme@gmail.com. B.A in Interdisciplinary Studies ( Focus disciplines: Business, Humanities, Marketing) Event planner. Organizer. Loving my crunchy, veggie life.
Posted in Cursory Resources, Let's Talk About Poly

Consent is more than saying yes

Posted on by shalysewb

Consent is more than saying yes.

Consent is having the information to make informed decisions in regards to your autonomy and respect.

Consent in relationships may include understanding your partners’ cognitive differences or ability differences. It may require “extra” communication for various needs.

When dealing with neurodivergent people and other cognitive differences, it is essential to understand the basics of cognition and ignition ability to understand where communication gaps may occur.

Differences can occur in:

❤Verbal comprehension or our ability to understand words, sentences, paragraphs.

❤Sensitivity to problems or our ability to problem-solve.

❤Syllogistic reasoning or drawing conclusions from premises.

❤Number facility or maths-related stuff.

❤Induction or process of making things happen.

❤General reasoning or finding solutions with more math-related stuff.

❤Associative memory or recollection based on information for unrelated things.

❤Span memory or recollection post initial introduction.

❤Associational fluency aka knowing synonyms

❤ Expressional fluency or your ability to convey your thoughts with accuracy.

❤Spontaneous flexibility, aka appropriate situational response.

❤Perceptual speed—Find instances of a pattern under speeded conditions.

❤Visualization or the ability to visualize concepts.

❤Spatial orientation or identifying objects placement in space.

❤Length estimation or the ability to estimate the distance between points.

I have tried to explain this in ways that will make sense to people that don’t study psychology. Please look at the links below and feel free to ask questions.

For more on cognition and cognitive ability:

https://www.sciencedirect.com/topics/social-sciences/cognitive-ability

https://cognitiontoday.com/what-is-cognition-executive-functions-and-cognitive-processes/

https://www.cambridgecognition.com/blog/entry/what-is-cognition

https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/career-development/cognitive-skills-how-to-improve-them

https://royalsocietypublishing.org/doi/10.1098/rstb.2017.0293

https://www.everydayhealth.com/neurology/cognitive-dissonance/how-cognitive-dissonance-affects-your-relationships/

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Posted in Uncategorized

Don’t focus on Resolutions.

Posted on by shalysewb 
A brief note:
In honor of the new year, here is the first official repost from Design and Scheme. 

Design and Scheme and a resource has existed since 2012. It was a labor of love and a community care project of a baby researcher and student of I/O psychology. In 2014, the Design and Scheme blog, websites, and social appeared to formalize and create an area in which people could more readily access information. The purpose of this site is to create a space to discuss the topics of event planning, organizing, and healthy living. This has always been done in an interdisciplinary and intersectional way, hence why I finally decided to join these. 

The primary offerings of this website are personal organizing services and productivity consulting that helps individuals learn compassionate self-care and accountability methods. Socially and politically speaking these terms mean different things. They are viewed as not accessible to all, but that is why I started this. Solutions and managing life's hardships should be a topic addressed for all. I have always spoken to the social expectation that unfairly targets those with disabilities and in poverty in various forums. Bringing these discussions to Revolution Kitty will help emphasize that because in this space we are not watering things down. 

If you have followed Design and Scheme you will notice that some articles did not make the transfer. I am archiving and portfolio-ing those articles. If they have helped you and you would like a copy, email kitty07@gmail.com to request a copy for your personal use. Yes, some offerings from Design and Scheme will still be available. Look for details about that in the coming year.

Don’t focus on Resolutions.

Some of you may remember from the #Vivesmart 2015 post that I’m not about New Year’s Resolutions. I’m about setting goals and making plans.

I just wanted to do a quick revisit on why.

When I make changes to my life, whether personal or professional, it’s to improve my current circumstances. I don’t want to waste my time starting something I will never do because I’m caught up in the excitement and the stereotypical ideas about what we are supposed to do.

I’m not knocking people who set New Year’s resolutions, just noting that they don’t work for me.

When you make a resolution, often you don’t sit down and work out the logistics and plan how you can make it happen. Often, if you fail at it once, you give up and use the excuse that it shouldn’t count against you because it was a resolution. And that’s great, as long as it wasn’t a substantial change.

I choose to use the S.M.A.R.T goals method to start any change that I want to make.

Recap.

Specific- What EXACTLY do you want?

Measurable- How will you know you reached your goal?

Attainable- Can it be achieved in the time you set?

Relevant- Does this goal fit in with your overall vision?

Timely- Setting a time frame to reach checkpoints or complete the goal.

This helps me to be sure that I am thinking about the relevance of the change and if it is essential and doable in my life.

So let you take away be this:

Change what will benefit you. Learn yourself and the areas where you truly need improvement. Love yourself enough to not set yourself up for failure.

xox

A recent interpretation of this post.
Posted in Kitty Whispers
Posted on by shalysewb

We should not be promoting the message for people to care less about anything. We should be telling each other to love more and care more. We also need to be willing to develop the skills to have boundaries, uphold those boundaries, and be able to communicate those boundaries.
Not caring doesn’t help anyone, much less yourself.

It teaches you to bottle up the negatives until it becomes too much.

We are stunting our interpersonal development.

Taking space is a boundary.
Ignoring a situation long-term is an unhealthy coping mechanism.
Decide how much space you need.

Posted in Kitty Whispers

Activism is A lot of Things

Posted on by shalysewb

I was pondering reactionary responses to oppression and the performative nature of people who criticize those who discuss socio-political issues and conduct various tasks of activism when it’s not blowing up on the news and social media. If you think this is necessary now, please keep the same energy you have when big stories have made the news when you hear people speaking about oppressive issues at other times. Y’all love to use your right to an opinion or your preferences to ignore voices and devalue opinions when convenient, and that’s part of the problem.

The other day I was discussing with someone how individualist ideologies are hurting us. That is not to say that being your own person and having your own sense of self and desires outside of family and community is wrong. It’s when your individualism is valued more than the collective needs of all as an essential foundation when it becomes problematic. The whole “this doesn’t affect me, so I don’t know about it” ideology. I mean, yes, this is the reality of most, especially those surviving, but for some of you, it isn’t just survival that has reduced your exposure. It is a choice. It is your choice to ignore the everyday struggle of folks. It is our collective choice to become reactionary rather than proactive in our social support.

Reactionary responses are the result of silencing. Silencing is repetitive and often overshadowed by the feelings and guilt of the non-oppressed. It is ingrained in many of our cultures and social circles. The idea that something is someone’s personal business because we stigmatize it and hide from discomfort. 

Please remember that. 

Make listening to minorities an everyday thing. Make understanding the flaws in our economic, social, and political systems something that we are ok with because it is necessary to grow as a social system. 

Activism is a lot of things. As I have witnessed, activism, at its roots, is helping to bring people back to the foundations of being civilized. We often attribute civilization with colonized beliefs of power and hoarding resources, but being civilized is more than that. You can have the tools or technology available, but if you are not culturally and socially adept as a social system, are you civilized or just technologically advanced.

So, before we condemn activism for what we do not understand and why it disturbs us outside of what we consider extreme circumstances, remember the various ways that activism can exist through advocates, education, and support. This is a general but not an exhaustive list. Some types are more effective in general. Some are more effective situationally. There is no one way, and you are misinformed if you think non-violence is the only way people have won their rights. 

xox,
kitty

Community building
Artivism
Communities of practice
Conflict transformation
Cooperative
Cooperative movement
Craftivism
Grassroots
Guerrilla gardening
Transition movement
Lobbying
Media activism
Culture jamming
Hacktivism
Internet activism
Peace activism
Non-violent resistance
Peace camps
Peace vigil
Moral purchasing
Petition
Political campaigning
Propaganda
Guerrilla communication
Protest
Boycott
Demonstration
Direct action
Performance Theater
Protest songs
Sit-in
Strike action
Hunger strike

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Posted in Verbose Redactions

A reminder from Rebecca

Posted on by shalysewb

A therapist can’t be their therapist.

Rebecca continually reminds me of this even though I’m not a therapist.
I’m a consultant, a mentor, and a guide. By profession, that is what I’ve chosen to do on multiple levels. I’ve been told that I am a hypocrite when I struggle because I give such great advice and have searched profound views and understandings of the world. Why do people decide that about people? I say things that make sense to me.

Rebecca continually reminds me is that being hypocritical may not be the case. Just because I understand and see what needs to be better doesn’t mean I can always guide myself to what needs to be better, considering disorders and differences that are a part of me; you know and being kinda human-like. I study psychology both as a hobby and a part of my profession. Every time Rebecca helps me navigate something that I struggle with, I’m angry at myself because I know that concept. Why can’t I Implement that concept the way that I help others to?  

Rebecca reminds me that I tell people it’s okay to struggle and need help, so why can’t I be as compassionate to myself as I am to those that come to me for help, whether paid or just as a peer or friend.

As I’ve processed this, I’ve noticed that a large part of it is the expectation that those who help others will always be able to help themselves because we know better. We aren’t supposed to be flawed. But the thing that I’ve always said is that it’s okay to be flawed, but you need to be willing to address those flaws and be willing to understand the impact and offer healing.

I sat with myself, and I thought about it. I do right by people, but I will not let myself be taken advantage of, and I will not take responsibility for the damaged others have done, whether they want to address it. That doesn’t make you a hypocrite.

But knowing that and moving through the hurt are very different things, which brings us back to the beginning.

A therapist can’t be their own therapist.